Have you ever found yourself reconnecting with a friend or loved one at the end of a day, and after 15 minutes of conversation you realized that you have not heard a word they said because you were lost in your thoughts planning for the next day or worrying about your upcoming week? How about that wasted week spent neglecting your responsibilities, getting irritated at your social support, worrying, ruminating, obsessing over the dream job you applied for and feeling inadequate, only to learn that you are not only qualified but the only candidate with a job offer?

Imagine you are on a dream tropical vacation that you have been planning for months to escape all your chores and daily stressors. It is winter, cold and snowy in your hometown, and you look forward to lounging on the beach in the warmth of the sun and playing in the turquoise seawater. Once you arrive to your resort town, it starts pouring rain, and the deep blue calm water turns into a sea of grey waves pounding the beach you were supposed to lay on. The weekly forecast is not going to change and you are stuck for a week in a setting that is far from what you have envisioned.

If you won the lottery would you stop working? This question might stimulate dreams of paying off lifelong credit card debts or student loans with just one click, instead of making monthly payments, taking a trip around the world instead of spending your day stuck in a cubicle. Waking to the sounds of the ocean’s waves instead of an alarm clock greeting you every morning. Breaking in your new sports car instead of sharing a crowded bus with fellow commuters.

“My therapeutic goal is to get rid of my anxiety.”

This type of client comment challenges therapists. Because how do you help meet these expectations when some symptoms, as comfortable as they might be, are simply part of being a human being?